Oh, man!

I will not go as far as to calling myself a feminist. I used to, but that was when I was in my early teens, and completely indoctrinated by the duties of being a woman that my all-girls Christian school required of me. However, I cannot help but seize every opportunity to complain about men.

Men, or that particular man who recently shaped my impression of the sex, have a good mouth. Oh, those sweet promises that they utter, and the praises too; something about us being pure and gentle. Well that’s settled, I’m heterosexual for sure, just to hear those words. But when you really think about it, this world will always remain a men’s world, for no matter how appreciative they are of us, they only want to sound appreciative so we would not go all mad-annoying-bitch on them. Especially when they don’t return our calls, or come back home later than they said they will, or accidentally told us to shut up. A man would please a woman, but only to make her stay as far away as possible, and to stop her from blogging about what he did.

I think it is because men are so hopelessly attracted to power, that bring about most arguments between the sexes. I must admit, women love power too. We like organizing things, making plans in our heads and trying our best to follow those plans. But men bring a whole new meaning to the word power. It is preventing all forms of intervention but their own, it is “wearing the pants”, it is confirming that their way of things is the only way available. Women still give in to men, not because we are weak, but because we are just so damn freaked out when men shout at us. In the end, we let men win.

They say women are unpredictable. That I cannot deny; but I am certain men beat us by a mile when it comes to changing their minds. I will be careful not to generalize, but a man is capable of liking many types of women, often at the same time; while a woman will only like one type of man, often for an entire lifetime. I read somewhere that a dead man may make many widows, but a dead woman seldom result in half a dozen widowers. This may very well be due to the fact that there are, unfortunately, exceedingly varied species of females. If that is what makes it so hard for men to observe fidelity, please accept my utmost apologies. But just because we are different, does not mean you can change your mind like that.

Women like caring and loyal men because we are pathetically insecure and pathologically suspicious. I hope I am not hard on my own sex, but I have never heard of a man who would nag, cry, and throw tantrums at the same time. However, we behave like that only because men force us to behave like that. Believe me, I really hate nagging, I really don’t want to be clingy and I certainly do not want to look like an idiot throwing tantrums. But because men are always controlling the way we think, silently threatening us with the huge possibility of changing their minds about us, and lying about things they want to do for us but will never achieve, sometimes even we ourselves have absolutely no idea what the heck is happening to us. I say our level of insecurity “pathetic” and suspicion “pathological” because it is not something we want to be, let alone something we are proud of. We are insecure not because we are born that way, but because men make women worry about them so intensely, it has become a universal female habit.

In an ideal world, women would be immune to false flattery. We will fall for the right guy who thinks and belief we are the right girl, and the couples will stay with each other until both return to dust. But this can never be. Because while men refuse to change, and as they most probably will, women will stay the same.

There are so many things I hate about men, but even when I was green, rebellious and new to puberty, I knew men will stay exactly the same no matter how hard I try. So here I propose something new. Since women and men are bound to get on each others’ nerves anyway, I suggest we just leave each other be. As Dolly Levi would put it, “You’ll go your way and I’ll go mine.”

But because the first woman was created by a rib from the first man, we are destined to cross each other’s path, even if we are to walk through deserts or mountains or oceans of fire with spiky rocks and crocodiles who only eat good people. When we find each other, we will quarrel more, but then we will also fall deeper in love.

Afterword
If the above rant made any party of the human population misjudge my respect for both sexes, please belief that such a respect is indeed present and hugely sincere. And if there are doubts as to my sexual orientation: I am straight as straight can be.

Sorry this is so long(winded). “Three thirds asleep” explains it all.